Aleksa Joanna - Birth Story

Glory to God for entrusting us with this little miracle.  We are overwhelmed with joy...

Where to begin… The last few weeks I’ve been busy finishing up photo sessions, still unpacking from our August move into our townhouse and trying to get things organized before the birth.  The to-do list was long and I was getting more and more tired, making the accomplishments slow.  We hadn’t finished the nursery, we hadn’t installed the car seat or even packed for the hospital. 

At 37 weeks, on November 19^th, we had our last photo session of the season.  Walked around Middleburg a lot that afternoon and I was exhausted.  I had been having lots of low pain and pressure  (for days I told John she was pressing on my cervix and I felt like her head was coming out!) After the session, John and I went to Olive Garden for dinner, knowing we might not get another date night for a while.  John thought we should go home since it had been a long day, but I really wanted to run by Babies R Us to pick up the list of necessities still on our registry.  More walking but we were able to finish and get most of what was needed for her to arrive in the next three weeks.  We got home and  both rushed around, cleaning and organizing before Bob (John’s Dad) arrived for a visit.  He arrived around midnight from NC, we chatted for a while then went to bed.

The next morning, I woke up not feeling well.  Just exhausted from the day before and slightly feeling sick.  So I stayed home to rest while John and Bob went to CrossCurrent for church.  That afternoon John and Bob decided to go hiking at Great Falls (they were planning to go on Monday but it was calling for rain).  I joked with John to keep his phone on him in case I went into labor.  He had a great time with his dad and they were able to find the same spot where his mom had been rappelling years before.  He had no idea he was about to become a Daddy!

While they were gone, I had my first contraction around 4:30pm.  Lasted a minute and went away.  Another one came around 6:15 pm. On the way home they stopped by Thai by Thai to bring home a yummy dinner (tropical fried rice!) and we spent the evening watching the Food Network.  Around 7:30pm I had my third contraction and after this point, contractions were steadily 20 mins apart.  I started writing the times down on a napkin as we continued to watch tv and casually mentioned it to John. He was nervous and told her to stay in there. :o)  He had been working a lot to finish up a project in November in order to take off most of December for her arrival, and he wasn't finished with the project yet!  I laughed and told him she was going to come on her own schedule.

We tried to go to bed that night but I couldn’t sleep.  Partly because of the contractions and partly because of my mind racing, “Could this be it?”  So I started packing.  Poor Bob is a light sleeper so I know I kept him awake as I putsied around the nursery, trying to pack what we needed for the hospital.  I let John sleep since I knew one of us should be getting rest!  So I quietly packed and brought stuff downstairs…  just in case.  Throughout the night contractions got closer together, down to 8 mins apart.

On Monday, the 21^st, I tried to lay down for a nap, knowing that if this was real labor, I certainly needed to get some sleep.  I was able to sleep for about 3 hours (somehow through the contractions!) But when I woke up, they were further apart and had jumped to being between 12 – 14 mins apart!  So we continued throughout the day, trying to get things done, installing the car seat and texting continuously with Aunt Meggie and Oma.  John, Bob and I went for a walk in the afternoon around the neighborhood and lake, trying to get things moving!  My doula, Amy, mentioned that Chinese food might get things moving so we ordered from Great China for dinner.  After eating, I took a long hot bath.  Then I chatted with lots of friends on facebook as to the pros and cons of taking castor oil.  I decided against it after hearing how rough it is on the stomach.

I talked with John’s sister Beth and she said that it could still be false labor. "Really??? After 25 hours?!?!"  After laboring all day, I was ready to meet my sweet baby!  The thought of the contractions stopping and then having to redo all the work I had done, was so discouraging!  Beth said we should go into the hospital to be monitored since they could tell me if the contractions were real or not.

So we went into the hospital around 9pm to get checked and confirm if it was real. The nurse even said it was false since I was still 10 mins apart and then when she checked me she was shocked.   I was 4 cm dilated, 80% effaced, and she said it was real!  We decided we wanted to go back home to labor some more so we headed back home around 11pm.  We tried to watch some tv and rest but the nurses check definitely triggered something (she was rough!) because the contractions soon became closer together (8 mins, then 7 mins apart) and much more intense.  The thought of sleeping through these contractions was completely pointless.  So I just kept trying to get into different positions, but it hurt to move. 

As things got more intense, I knew I didn’t want to be walking down the steps, with the contractions getting closer.  At 2:53am, I called Amy (our doula) and she rushed over to meet us at the house.  We got to the hospital around 3:30am, the nurse confirmed I was now 6 cm and 90% effaced and they admitted me to my labor and delivery room.  As soon as we walked in, Amy and I looked at each other, both realizing that we were in the same room that Laura had been in, while giving birth to Adelaide! 

We got settled and the nurse asked me a lot of questions in between contractions.  As the hours went on, I tried to labor in different positions; leaning over the birthing ball, getting on my hands and knees on the bed, sitting, laying, etc.  I think I tried just about everything!  Also, I had a super awful cold / congestion so I literally couldn't breathe through the contractions which just made it more miserable. I would try to sit down in between contractions but it hurt so badly to stand back up or move once the next contraction started.  And I was exhausted!  The only position I liked was slow dancing with John.  I draped my arms around his shoulders and we swayed back and forth, with him holding up my weight.

Around 7:00am the contractions jumped from 5 mins apart, to being pretty consistent, with no break in between.  John and Amy were doing everything they could to help me relax.  John would massage my feet while Amy massaged my shoulders with grapefruit lotion.  They’d both press on my back and hips during contractions to try to relieve some of the pressure.  Amy also used a sock that was filled with rice and heated up, as a heating pad for my back….  The nurses kept saying that my water was still intact and that they might have to break it, which would make the contractions more intense.  I remember being really scared about this since I couldn’t imagine them getting more intense. 

Close to 8:00am they suggested I get into the labor tub.  I almost objected because the contractions were continuous and I was afraid it would be too difficult to get back out of the tub.  I was so glad I did, the hot water felt wonderful and was so relaxing, even among the pain.  I didn’t realize this at the time, but they told me later than I even fell asleep for about 15 mins in the tub, and so did John!   We were both so tired.   After about 45 mins, I got out of the tub because we thought my water might have broken.  Amy and John helped lift me out of the tub and get me into the hospital gown I brought. 

I soon felt like I had to push and made my way to the bed.  I told John that I didn’t think I could do this anymore.  The nurses went to get Dr. Foster.  He checked me, saying I was 9 cm but still had some cervical lip in the way, and that I need to wait another 30 mins.  After about 20 mins, I really felt like I had to push.  Like it was a reflex that I couldn’t stop.  They went to get Dr. Foster and he said it was fine for me to start pushing. 

I remember being scared of how long it might take.  I kept asking John and the nurses how long the pushing would take.  I was just so completely exhausted.  They asked if I wanted a mirror to watch, which I was ok with.  I remember being slightly discouraged by the mirror.  Everyone kept saying, “She’s so close!  She’s almost here!” but since I could only see the mirror in between contractions, I couldn’t see anything!  (John said the progress was like two steps forward, one step back).  But all I kept thinking is, “She’s not almost here!  I still have to push a huge head through me!”  And thinking it would take forever. 

The pressure was something I can't describe. I truly felt like my body was going to split open.  And the "ring of fire" that women talk about, is unfortunately very true.  After 45 mins of pushing, Dr. Foster decided to give me a partial episiotomy since it was obvious my body wasn't stretching enough for her.  As soon as he cut (I was already in so much pain, I didn't even know he had cut), her head was able to come out.  Dr. Foster then yelled for me not to push.  I honestly didn't realize what was going on, my body was pushing regardless and I just felt so delusional.  The cord was wrapped around her neck twice, so he quickly clamped and cut the cord so her body could then come out.  John said later that he was shocked at how quickly this happened. 

At 10:13am on November 22nd, after 39 hours of labor, our little Aleksa was finally here!  Dr. Foster lifted her onto me.  She was so beautiful and perfect!  The nurses took her to clean her up, weigh and measure, do her Apgar score, etc.  Our tiny baby was 5 lb 14.5 oz and 18.5 inches long; with long fingers and toes, the sweetest little lips and cutest button nose.

John was able to cut the umbilical cord again a little closer to the clamp and he followed the nurses who gave her her first bath.  Amy and Lori stayed with me until they returned (I was busy shaking like a crazy woman and being stitched up) and then I attempted to nurse her.  After about two hours, they moved us to the post-partum room and we began having some visitors.  John dad (Aleksa's Pappy) who was supposed to go back home that morning, was able to meet his new granddaughter right before he had to leave town.  My parents (Aleksa's Oma & Opa) also quickly drove up and loved spending several hours with us, meeting their first grandchild.

I was so thankful that we were able to accomplish so many items from our birth plan and have the safe, natural birth that we wanted for our baby.  It was definitely long and difficult, but so worth it.  The only part that makes me sad, is how quickly they took her from me to do all the little procedures.  I really wanted to have awhile to bond with our new little family, but I was too delusional to have the strength to speak up about it.  But I am thankful.  God had granted our prayer, she was here and safe and healthy.

I've attached some of the photos below, from the birth. Some may think that's weird to have a photographer in the L&D room but I treasure these photos!  Lori Moore did an amazing job and I could not be more grateful that she was there to capture these moments for us!  www.lorimoorephoto.com