When we learned we were pregnant, we were so excited and hopeful for the months to come. While the pregnancy was fairly easy (never got any morning sickness), we had no idea that life was about to get more difficult in general. I don't have time to type out all the details but here's a summary of our chaotic few months...
The most exciting thing in April was at 6 weeks pregnant when we had our first sonogram. We got to see our little jellybean and even hear her precious strong heartbeat!
We were living in Gainesville and learned from our landlords that they were selling the townhome. We had to move. So for the next month we endured as realtors traipsed through our home (many times, unannounced) with families to look at the house. So annoying.
In May, we decided to move into another rental. We moved to a small townhome in Sterling and immediately didn't feel right. They had just painted the entire place and within a few days, as soon as the paint dried, there was a smell. An awful smell that wouldn't go away and we began to feel sick whenever we were home for long. When I left one day to run some errands, two neighbors stopped me to explain that the property manager was super shady and the last family had to move out because of mold. There had been extensive water damage to the front of the unit (the room that was going to be the nursery!!) and the property manager refused to acknowledge or fix it. So, very long story short, we had to get a mold inspector to prove our case, pay extra rent to get out of the lease, and move out, two weeks after we had moved in.
We found an amazing realtor and began the process of trying to buy a townhouse. While we were waiting to close, God completely provided and allowed us to stay with two sets of friends. So with our stuff in storage, we lived out of suitcases for the entire summer. After five homes falling through, (various reasons: owner refusing to fix big items, owners greatly overpricing and the appraisals coming back $42K under price and not wanting to live next to a sex offender, etc) lots of stress and a very patient realtor; we FINALLY found our home and closed at the end of August. For a total of five moves in three months!
Beginning in June, John's mom, (Aleksa's Mammaw) began to get sicker from stage four colon cancer. She was diagnosed in April 2009, and did really well for 2 years. Tons of prayers, multiple surgeries and lots of chemo. She was always in really high spirits and you honestly would never know she had stage four cancer!
In July we went to NC to be with her and the family. When we arrived, Jo was in the hospital. The first night, she was really silly from the morphine. At one point she was insisting that she needed to shave her chin and asked the nurse if she could see all of the hair there. The nurse replied, "Uh... no." Then Jo said she had so much hair on her chin that she was going to join the circus as the bearded lady, and that her act would be singing, "Ana Gadda da Vida, baby! Pow! Pow!" Complete with pyrotechnics at the end and fireworks motions with her hands. :o) She also talked about the morphine smelling like purple.
We were able to tell her that we were having a girl and that the middle name would be in honor of her. She was thrilled but surprised since she felt like we might be having a boy. The most special thing is that she read a recordable storybook for Aleksa and we were able to get video as she read it. Which we were so glad we did because of her comments in between the recordings!
Family (her sisters and dad, Pappaw) came in from Ohio to see her and essentially say goodbye. We even had a "Christmas in July" celebration at the hospital... just in case. There were some great moments; laughing together and having a hospital "spa day" of painting her nails and doing her hair. Also some sad moments where she would cry and say this was all happening too fast. We really didn't know what to expect since she would get sick and then seem to improve just as quickly. She even called from the hospital to make sure we recorded her favorite tv show for her. We had to record the entire series cause she was certain she'd be here to see all of it! :o)
After a few days, she was released home and we spent the next few weeks taking care of her. She is such an amazing, strong woman! While the hospital had called in Hospice to come care for her at the house a few days a week, we kept seeing her improve and get better and better. She couldn't wait to start doing things on her own. And after a few days, she was plowing through the house on her walker, to sit in her recliner to keep working on the cross-stitch for Aleksa. She talked a lot about how she just had to be here to meet our sweet baby.
There were nights where we would crowd in her room; John would play guitar, Leigh would rub lotion on her Mammaw's feet and we would all just talk and laugh and pray together. One particular night she started talking about death and her wishes. She explained how she had already called different funeral homes to do some "comparison shopping." She also told Bob to look in the closet for the outfit she bought him to wear to her memorial service. We all started laughing and asked why on earth she was planning ahead and buying him an outfit for her memorial. She replied, "Because no grieving man is going to go shopping!" She always kept her sense of humor :o)
Then there were other nights where she just prayed and cried with her kids, and several times that she saw angels. She saw her mother, Beth's son and a man in her hospital room who said it was time to go. She said no, that it was too soon. He said ok and left.
Faith, Eric and the boys had to leave to go back home, and Bob had to go back to work in another part of NC. So John and I, and Beth, Mike, Leigh and Catie, stayed another week to help take care of her. I'm so thankful John was able to work from there and we were able to have that extra week with her. Jo's wonderful friend Nancy, Beth and I, took turns with the night shift, medicines, meals, changing her IV and stomach bag; and anything else she needed. We also did a lot of juicing that week since she was on a liquid diet to give her as much nutrition as we could. Of course, she did cheat just a little and we gave her one bite of pancake. It really was a wonderful week. She seemed stronger and stronger, and Hospice was impressed.
When we left to go back home, we honestly thought we would see her again in September for the family reunion. Hospice said they could contact people in Kentucky to help if we needed and we were all looking forward to being at the cabins together. We said goodbye, that we loved her and would see her in September. She told me to take care of that baby, and we walked out the door. My last memory of her was as we were leaving, I paused at the front door cause I noticed she was singing (as she was working on the cross stitch). I really wish I knew now what song she was singing... I think it was an old hymn.
About another week or two went by and we started getting calls from Beth. She was going down hill and getting sick quickly. We were hoping it was just reaction to some of the meds and that she'd be feeling better soon. She had bounced back so many times before.
One day we were running errands and walking out of the post office when Jo called John. We went back to sit in the car. She was crying; telling John goodbye, to not be mad at her if she couldn't hold on, and that she wished she could be here to meet Aleksa. And that she knew Aleksa would be beautiful. He got off the phone and we both didn't know what to think. Was she really getting ready for the end? Or was it just a bad day?
The next few days were really rough. She started going in and out of consciousness and she asked Beth to leave and for us to not come down. She said she didn't want her kids there to see her at the end. So Bob was her only caregiver. He gave her morphine drops since she didn't want to be on an IV, but they wore off every hour so he was up around the clock, for days. On August 11th, Jo went home to be with our Lord. We were upset she was gone but so relieved she was no longer in pain. We went down to NC for her memorial, moved out of Sandie's and into our new home the following weekend, then went to Kentucky the next weekend and had another graveside service at the family reunion.
In October, we went to the beach for the weekend for a mini babymoon, took maternity photos with our friend Lori, and continued unpacking and trying to prepare the nursery.
November was busy. I was trying to nest, unpack, continue preparing for baby and finish up as much as I could with the business before she arrived. My due date was December 11 so I thought I had time. I continued to take on more families and photographed four sessions in October and five in November. I had no idea our little girl was about to arrive early...
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